SILENCE = CONSENT

Realness

GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES, AND MAY THE BEST WOMAN WIN!

RuPaul’s Drag Race is one of my favorite shows on television.  Anyone who knows me will be able to attest to that fact.  I’m always intrigued by the Creativity, Uniqueness, Nerve and Talent that most drag queens possess.  Their being able to transform and create the female illusion is the ultimate for me.  One of my favorite contestants this past season was Mariah Balenciaga.  HUN-T WAS FIERCE!!!  Mariah captured everything that is femininity and presented it with class, elegance and REALNESS.  To me, she pays true homage to the feminine.  To me, the realness factor is paramount.

One thing most drag queens have is quick whit and sharp tongues.  It’s really an endearing quality.  And I love the ones who “keep it real”.  Keeping it real, one would assume would be defined as one always having the courage to be truthful, to walk in integrity.  “Realness” would be a good thing.  In a perfect world, whether in full geech or in real life, being able to truly serve realness should be something we all aspire to.  But more often than not, like good drag, what is perceived as “realness” is just an illusion.  For some people, their realness is just as deep as the makeup and costumes they would wear to lipsinc for their lives.

In this day and age, it seems like people actually prefer illusion to realness.  What does it say about us?  Have people become so jaded that we’d rather present and celebrate illusions than living authentic lives?  Has “keeping it real” become an illusion itself?

Too often in gay culture, we see people say and do mean and hurtful things to other people.  It’s normal.  In fact the arrogance and cattiness is expected and seen as just a part of being gay.  But does it really have to be that way?  It’s one thing to read someone for pure filth because they are coming for you and you haven’t sent for them… that’s merely self defense.  But it’s quite another to just be mean and hateful.

Usually the mean and hateful queens are truly insecure little boys (or girls) who are trying to present the illusion that they are grand.  People who are ALWAYS in “reading mode” or are always catty are trying to hide something.  They are trying to hide the fact that what they are presenting is not reality.  In fact, their reality is too hard for THEM to deal with, so they treat others badly trying to make themselves feel better about their own lives.  It’s really sad when you think about it.  When it’s easier for a person to attempt to live their illusion than present a real person to the world, there’s a big problem.  It’s dangerous for the lines of realness and illusion to be blurred.

One thing about drag, when it’s done well, it’s very entertaining.  Being able to serve realness is indeed a beautiful thing.  And from what I understand, one can make MAD coins.  But when the music stops, when the deejay and the crowd goes home, and the lights go out, the illusion stops and real life begins.  Sure, we all have a persona that we present to the world.  Thing is, what we present to others should be the real us, not an illusion or a character we’ve created.  If one truly has the courage, keeping it real is more beautiful than any illusion will ever be.  If only more people understood that.

In the classic movie “To Wong Foo: Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar”, the late Ms. Vida Boheme taught us one valuable lesson that everyone must learn to live… REAL queens always use their powers for good, and in every situation, seek out the opportunity to help others.  THAT my dear, is better than the best illusion.  It’s realness at its finest.

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One response

  1. Deeone

    Very well put, Tuan. It says a lot for people to stand up and be themselves. And when someone who isn’t secure comes along and attempts to tear down, what a person has walk through the struggle just to get there; you’re right, that’s only a reflection of the person feelings towards themselves.

    When a person continuously shows me their true self, I believe them; and decide right then and there, if that relationship deserves my occupancy of space. But, I always pay close attention to how a person treats me and others; people will tell you their story if we just watch them.

    Oh, and I totally agree with you; Miss Mariah should have totally won that race! 🙂 Loved this post!

    May 13, 2011 at 6:10 pm

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